Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Home Opener and Dirkulence


So another Home Opening Day has come and gone.

Jeff Blair summed it up nicely.

The highlight of the day for me was seeing Dirk Hayhurst at Chapters on John St. My associate and I came from out of town, so we decided to make a day of it. I was worried that it would be packed, but we were surprised when we did our 2:00 reconnaissance and it was deserted.

The eloquent pitcher-slash-author read the 'Grandma' chapter of the book, answered some questions, and, of course, garfoosed the books. There was chocolate cake, autographs, and goofy photos for all.

Sadly, Hayhurst sounded pessimistic about the progress of his shoulder rehab. "It's not encouraging when the surgeon says, 'hmmm, that's not supposed to happen,'" to paraphrase.

Hayhurst states via Twitter that he hit several bookstores today randomly signing books, so if you don't have a copy already, go on a wild garfoose chase and find yourself a signed copy.

The game itself was... what it was. Highlights? My chin just about hit the floor at Buck's 400-level dinger. My heart was warm and fuzzy at the lack of booing Wells. Rios? I was rather indifferent.

Lowlights? I wasn't even that disappointed at Frasor's blown save, since we had no choice but to leave by then anyway to catch our bus. The definite lowlights were the usual Opening Day retardedness of the non-fans. I am really leaning toward the DJF's preference to just stay away. I'm sure by next February, I'll be saying to myself, "but... but... IT'S THE OPENER." But it really does feel more frustrating than fun when you're continually distracted by the non-fans. I pay to see a baseball game, not a frat party, not the whorey Bud Girls posing with dudes at the bottom of the section, completely blocking the view of the game. (Yeah, not even waiting until between innings.) I rarely go to bars, and ball games are pretty much my "party time", so I strongly resent said party time being spoiled by a giant frat party preventing me from getting a god damned beer.

It wasn't just the alcohol; it was the same for concessions. My associate and I arrived at the gates before they opened. We were down at the 100 level York Market well before 6:00, and even though it wasn't crowded, it took everyone forever to get their food. The staff were running around with clipboards and no one was getting served. Blue Jays, you should have paid them an extra hour or half hour to get that crap done before the gates opened.

There has to be a way of making the experience better for "real" fans and/or casual fans over the age of... first beer retard. A rebuilding team that doesn't pack the house every night can't afford to turn off fans. A penny for Jeff's thoughts on the issue. Ideas from this uneducated fan include: a section reserved for season ticket and flex pack holders, available prior to individual game sale dates, where there are no group sales (unless they're not students) and have priority concession service. Perhaps a 30+ section (hard to enforce, but...) Perhaps access to the HSBC lounge, which I'm going to assume was only available to sponsors and/or People With Connections, who probably don't even give a shit about the game.

Until then, maybe we'd all rather just join the DJFs at Opera Bobs.



Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Thoughts On Dirk Hayhurst's "The Bullpen Gospels"

So just like all the other cool kids, I read Dirk Hayhurst's "The Bullpen Gospels." I laughed, I cried. It is truly an outstanding book and lives up to its hype. (My review, blah blah blah.)

Today, Hayhurst engaged fans in a live chat at Baseball America. He is at least teasing us with the prospect (huh huh) of another book, and gave us Aaron Hill's opinion of TBG:
He didn't get around to finishing it, but in ST this year he said, "I was surprised, it was, you know, good! I thought it would be another baseball book..." I'll take it!

He also answered Yours Truly's question regarding the cover of the book. Egads, Pinstripes. My Yankees fan coworker mocked me for it. Here's what would have been on the cover if His Dirkulence would have had any say in it:
It would have been me being strangled by my grandmother. Yeah, I know the pin-stripes got a lot of sneers (sorry Yankees, I know you won it all, but a lot of people still don't like you...) I also thought about me standing in the snow in my undies with this pathetic smirk on my face... the Baseball Reaper next to me with a foam finger that says #1 fan.

I think either would have worked nicely.